EXCUSE LETTERS

 

The routine is familiar: when a student is late or absent from school, a letter from the parents must be supplied for the absence to be excused. Sometimes such letters suggest that the parents were excused from school too many times in their own youth.

• "Sally won't be in school a week from Friday. We have to attend her funeral."
• "My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent a weekend with the Marines."
• "Please excuse Jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold and could not breed well."
• "Please excuse Mary for being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps."
• "Gloria was absent yesterday as she was having a gangover."
• "Please excuse Burma, she has been sick and under the doctor."
• "Maryann was absent December 11-16, because she had a fever, sore throat, headache, and upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever, and sore throat, her brother had a low grade fever and ached all over. I wasn't the best either, sore throat and fever. There must be something going around, her father even got hot last night."