We're all fluent in this modern language. It's what we use when we want to exaggerate a little bit on our resumes or applications. It's also what we adopt when we're looking for a new person to join our company -- or not. Here's one interpretation of this secret labour code that appears in classified ads, cover letters, and resumes:
"ENTRY-LEVEL POSITION:" You'll be making under $7 an hour.
"ENTRY-LEVEL POSITION IN AN UP-AND-COMING COMPANY:" You'll be making under $7 an hour; we'll be bankrupt in a year.
"AN UP-AND-COMING SOFTWARE COMPANY:" We want you to get your hopes up, but there's no chance in hell we'll be the next Microsoft.
"PROFIT-SHARING PLAN:" Once it's shared between the higher-ups, there won't be a profit.
"COMPETITIVE SALARY:" We remain competitive by paying less than our competitors.
"JOIN OUR FAST-PACED COMPANY:" We have no time to train you; you'll have to introduce yourself to your co-workers.
"NATIONALLY RECOGNIZED LEADER:" Inc. Magazine wrote us up a few years ago, but we haven't done anything innovative since.
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