- All things mechanical/electrical will catastrophically fail after the guarantee has expired, unless an extended guarantee has been purchased.
- The Harvard Principle:
Under the most rigorously controlled conditions of temperature, humidity, pressure, etc., the organism will do as it damn well pleases. - First Law of Linear Equations: Given any system n linear equations, there will be n+1 unknowns
- The disappearance of a nagging error in a system is explicable only in terms of insignificant contribution of the source to that system
- The repairman will have never seen a model quite like yours before
- Law of Repairmen: The repairman fixes your machine to break down the next day and charges for a new machine.
- While technology progresses at the speed of light it's implementation is filtered through the speed of bureaucracy
- In theory there is no difference between theory and practice, but in practice there is.
- Stationary engineering law: never underestimate incompetency
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