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The fire department in your home town has at least a 5 minute response time
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The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earth worms dizzy
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It will, however, make cats dizzy
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Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy
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Quiet does not necessarily mean 'don't worry'
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A good sense of humour will get you through most problems in life unfortunately, mostly in retrospect
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Cats with spray painted butts can still poop
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Motor oil kills flowers
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Remote controls don't fit down the toilet
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Remote controls don't work after being put into a toilet
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